If it wasn’t bad enough when people from different countries couldn’t understand each other now thanks to online translators, total incoherence is guaranteed! If you thought “All your base are belong to us,” was bad you haven’t seen anything yet! Here are the forty worst translated labels in the world!
#40 Shitto Sauce
Appetizing and delicious, and it also keeps you regular… try Shitto brand today!
#39 Andrew’s Hand Job
Not with me you don’t, Andrew.
#38 Colons Go Better With Coke
My cousin drank way too much Coke and ended up having surgery on his Oaramel Colon.
#37 Best Of Beijing
Like you have to tell me this was Made In China?
#36 Tortoise Crossing
Hey, tortoises have just as much right to visit the museum as you do, buster!
#35 Stupid Ice Tea
Stupid is as stupid does… or is that stupid does as stupid is… or…
#34 Smokehouse
When a building asks a smoked visitor, he’d better listen… or else!
#33 Say It Don’t Spray It
What a silly translation. What they should have written is: Shut up and don’t spit!
#32 Clark Kent’s Biscuits
So does this mean that the biscuits feel of smog and grime?
#31 Offered Nuts
I think I’ll pass on the offer, but thank you very much anyway.
#30 Cat Smack
Don’t you dare smack the cat! That’s animal abuse!
#29 SexySoap
With you, only with you, forever, my love… I’ll scrub myself all over your naked body and clean your most intimate places until we…
#28 Lampblack Evader
The guy who wrote this must have been dipping into the chemical liquor and should definitely be kept away from sharp abjects.
#27 Why Does Poor People?
because you can’t solve poverty by throwing money at it.
#26 Eat The Crack
Ok, so don’t burn it, wait for the board to turn black and then do what with my fine crack?
#25 Peripheral Sanity
If there are two things I will not stand for it’s bigotry and dry dirt.
#24 Healthy Balls
Yeah, balls in hand, ramming with hands, sure relaxes my mind…
#23 Best Price
You think so, huh? Well f*** your certain price of goods too!
#22 Gobbleraser
Another damn Nazi label! What if I do want to eat my eraser? How are you going to stop me?
#21 Soup Nazi Hat
I’m sick and tired of labels telling me what I can and can’t do!
#20 Blandness Girl
The perfect gift for your lovely little wallflower!
#19 Treat A Forest
Turning pet bottles into yarn truly does help deforested treeat forest belts!
#18 Guilty Groper
I keep telling the girls that they can experience a pleasanty surprise of groping, but they always slap me!
#17 Horny Marker
There is no safety when you f*** the sex with a marker! Use a condom!
#16 Vidal Sazzzzzzoon
Dang it, and I was hoping to finish off my do while I had a nap!
#15 Social Lychee
I think that the Chinese have taken their social engineering a bit too far.
#14 Burned Batard
Another product from Pyro Foods’ Crispy Critters brand.
#13 Burnedmeat Biscuits
They’re brought to you by the people that made Cremated Chicken famous.
#12 Twilight Zone
Make sure you only use this indoor and outdoor and no place inbetween!
#11 Unable Dispute
If you have to have aftertaste without end, at least make sure it’s fashionable.
#10 Pooh Biscuits
Especially when the kids have had too many of these!
#9 Elmo Craps
Not much of an educational toy… kids are supposed to learn to use toilet paper.
#8 Homo Sausage
Nooooooooooo mooooooooooooooore!
#7 Tourist Canned Meat
I said enough already!
#6 Cock On The Mountain
I think we’ve gone far enough with these jokes.
#5 JoeRex’s Ball
I wouldn’t let JoeRex near my biggest organ (or Adam Lambert for that matter). Even no concept but still good sense… er… I don’t think so.
#4 Cum Bar
And this is not the location where they hold their weekly Club meetings!
#3 Dick Stick
There is absolutely no truth to the nasty rumor that Dick Stick is the official snack of the Adam Lambert Fan Club.
#2 Coleslaw Wring
I’m sorry sir, I can’t accept this garment for refund, as it’s obvious you wrung it in coleslaw.
#1 Pet Sweat
Run faster, Fido, sweat more! I’m dying of thirst!
Although the Chinese are by far the worst offenders in incoherent labeling, stupidity can be found almost anywhere. U.S. Immigration recently seized a fake passport: It was one of the most accurate forgeries ever, but the cover was titled: United State Of America Passport.
